Friday, August 25, 2006

a bedtime story and free bibles

When I was about 12, I got up in the middle of the night feeling queasy. I walked out of my bedroom and and stumbled down the hall to the bathroom door. I stopped knowing full well I wouldn't make it to the toilet, but couldn't decide whether to throw up on the carpet in the hallway or the bathroom rug.

But before you go on to read the rest of the story (insert Paul Harvey's whistling /s/ here), be sure to check out the new renter over to your right- my left, I'm on the other side of the screen don't ya know? Free Grabber is a nice little joint full of links to satisfy all your freebie needs. From free Cliffnotes' style bibles (Come on, dude, the original version is way long ans BORING.) to Motzart chart-topping single downloads (Sweet!). Maybe the Free Grabber will be adding links for some more desirable items like iPods and those new fangled picture taking cellphones, but for now, we'll have to take condensed bibles and classical music. Hey, you get what you pay for.

In case you were wondering, I chose the carpet, thinking that Mom would be more upset if I did it on the rug since it was more of a shag texture and would probably hold on to nasty bits of upchuck. Still don't know what my reasoning was, but I think it had something to do with the half-assed logic that you wake up with when you're fucking nauseas.

Shove it up your ass, Jim Perdue.

When it comes to publicly humiliating the very animals you make money off of slaughtering, where do you draw the line?

Recently, I had the displeasure of watching one of the many Perdue chicken commercials that Jim Perdue likes to not only make an appearance in, but give himself the star role. If you haven't seen it yet, basically it involves the CEO of the chicken coop checking his email. He finds a message from a certain someone asking if he ever considers giving his chickens treats, like doughnuts for example. Perdue responds saying that he only feeds the chickens corn and other healthy stuff. Anyway, the emails go back and forth and eventually Jim gets suspicious that one of those blasted chickens is in on it. He takes a walk down to the coop and cuts off their internet access as if he treated them oh-so well before giving orders to break their necks and package them up for sale.

Is it me, or this a little disturbing? I'm not a vegetarian, although I was once many years ago, but come on, have a little respect for the creatures you're about to chop to bits and sell.

Jim Perdue, who's the chicken now?

I have no idea what I meant by that either.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Gone tanning.

Again, thanks for stopping by and checking out my little place, even though my posts have been absolute crap as of late. I appreciate the passerbys (hmm, that's a word...) from my landlady, Janet, and yes, the old folks like David A. are always fun to have swing by.

Since I will be on vacation this next week, it would behoove you to not only check out my renter GreenTeaRocks, but also all the Smiling Liars (which includes the forementioned David Amulet who is the official Daily Show anchorman of Blogger) and a ton of other great blogs as well. I would start to name them all off, but sheeyoot, don't wanna leave anyone out.

And if you really wanna, and I would also highly recommend getting your hands dirty and reading the archives, maybe even like the first month or two I started this thing. Those old ass posts have no comments. Go comment the hell out of them if you want. Or not. Whichever.

In conclusion, have a nice week and I've been waiting a long fucking time to work behoove into a conversation.

Thank you.


Thursday, August 03, 2006

Why, hello there new people!

Just wanted to say hello and thanks for stopping by to everyone that came from Janet's blog. Nice to have some fresh blood running through the veins of Blogger via BE's Rent My Blog.

And speaking of renting and renters of blogs, if you haven't done so already, please make sure to stop over at my newest tennant's place GreenTeaRocks. KristinaQ has done quite a bit spiffing up the place and you should check it out. I love the smell of fresh paint in the morning. Another reason to go is she having a contest! Free T-shirts! WooHoo! And I heard she's gonna give away a bunch of points she won at BlogMad....well, you'll just have to go and check it out for yourself.

I'll have a story to tell tomorrow, I'm sure.